Thursday, October 28, 2010

More Fall Photos

I posted some of my amateur fall photos in my previous post, but over the weekend I also had a good friend of mine take some professional photos of The Chubs. She is amazing and so talented! Here are some of my favorites! Check her out at Kristin Beam Photography.

Friday, October 22, 2010

Co-sleeping? Not for us.

First I want to preface this post by saying that I in no means am bashing co-sleeping. I know many terrific moms that co-sleep with their babies and it works out fantastically. In fact at times I kind of envy that special bond, being able to listen to your baby's breath at night, see him/her first thing in the morning, snuggle etc., but The Chubs is anything but a snuggler. It makes me sad because I love holding her and rocking her, but it just doesn't do it for her. I think her sensory issues are to blame. Since she is sensation avoiding with sensory sensitivity, it means cuddling and holding are not her favorite things.

So, on to my story. Today was a rough day. The Chubs is finally cutting one of her top teeth. However, it is not completely through. It's like it's intentionally teasing me. One half of the tooth is out, the other side is covered still with a very thin layer of skin. COME ON!!! So because of this chubadevelopment, naps were non-existent today for the most part and when you combine lack of sleep with pain, it pretty much is the ugliest thing since Janet Jackson flashed her tatas at the super bowl.

Nothing was making her happy so I decided to lay a blanket on the floor in her room and lay next to her, to see if she would calm down. To try to demonstrate what she should be doing, I laid on my back completely still with my eyes closed. I was excited when her crying stopped and all I could hear was the suction of her paci ...

... that is until I felt a warm sweaty palm on my face, followed by a finger up my nose accompanied by a lot of giggling. Shortly after my eye was being clawed out and then my hair pulled. Still more giggling. I laid there quietly and tried to count to 60 without reacting. But between her little nails digging into my face and then high pitched squeals and giggles, it was hopeless. The positive thing is that she was happy and no longer crying. The negative thing was that I was convinced there was no way I was going to leave this floor without having scratches and drool all over my face.

It was pretty clear within 30 seconds that this wasn't going to work. She was rolling all over the floor pulling at her crib skirt, pulling at my ears, hair, nose, and anything else that was within reach and having a grand old time. I figured, hey, she's happy now, might as well place her in the crib again. How wrong I was. The moment I put her back in the crib again, my cranky child was back again. How quickly she can shut it on and off. I think she's going to have a very successful career in acting one day.

So, I think it's safe to say there will be no more co-sleeping for us in the future.

Monday, October 11, 2010

I've HAD it with teething

I'm at my wits end. The Chubs has been working on her top teeth for weeks now. They have been swollen with her teeth hovering just below the surface and they have decided to make the slowest most agonizing appearance ever. The top teeth are so much worse than the bottom ones, it's ridiculous. We've had flat out refusal and highchair tantrums with solids, painful long bed times that consist of inconsolable fussing, naps that don't last more than about 10-15 min., and just general overall crankiness almost constantly.

Chubadub's Teeth,

Would you PLEASE just come out and break the surface already? If you don't come soon, I think I may admit myself to a mental institute. Don't you realize how ridiculously long you are taking? Haven't you figured out that a child that ALREADY has sensory issues is about the worst type of baby to take your sweet old time with? I would love to stop drugging up my child and get my Failure to Thrive baby to start eating well again. She already has enough in the oral aversion department, we don't need to add sore aching gums to our never ending list of issues. It's a little important, thankyouverymuch.

The Chub's Mom

Thursday, October 7, 2010

So much to do, so little time.

Eating, for the most part, continues to go fairly well around here. I have finally started to relax, even on the days where The Chub Muffin eats a little less than normal. I no longer go into full-out panic mode. I've learned to try to look at the big picture. She ate exceptionally for over a month, she is allowed to have a day here and there where her intake is down. Solids are going well. We are making progress. Her intake is still not huge but I'm shifting her schedule (which should've probably been done when we started solids) to a 4 hour schedule. The 3 hour schedule was just too much now that she's having 3 solid meals a day along with 4 bottles (excluding her early morning and late night feedings). She needs some time to feel hungry and anticipate food. I'm hoping once she's adjusted to the new schedule that feedings will improve a bit. She's doing stage 2 purees now. We're moving slowly due to her sensory issues and oral aversion. The feeding therapist said we could stay at stage 2 for a few months and be completely fine. Whenever we bring anything new into the picture it takes awhile for her to get used to it and comfortable with it, so bringing in the sippy cup has been, well.... challenging.

This girl is NOT in love with her bottle, so as far as that goes, it shouldn't be a big deal to ditch the bottle in the near future. The main hurdle will be getting her to drink from something else.

Our OT came today to work with The Chubs and she is going to request a PT (physical therapist) to come twice a month so that at our sessions she can focus most of her attention on her eating and sensory issues. One hour is just not enough to cram in everything together. Plus, The Chubs gets pretty tired and a little overstimulated with so much activity.

I'm so thankful she's getting the help she needs but I have to be honest. I am exhausted. I'm tired of not only trying to feed her everyday and deal with refusal, but spending every other minute doing therapy exercises. I literally can not even count or remember all of the exercises I should be doing with her on a daily basis. There are a million feeding exercises and all these different items I need to slowly introduce at meal time and try with her. There are a million more sensory exercises and therapies that she needs to be getting daily to help regulate and organize her nervous system, along with many other gross and fine motor exercises that should only really be done on an empty stomach so she doesn't puke up her last meal.

I wouldn't trade The Chubs for any other baby in the world. She is my precious miracle, I love her so much. Sometimes I do, however, wish that I could just be a mom to her, and she could just be my daughter instead of a doctor/patient, teacher/student role 24/7. I wish I could take her to the zoo for a day without worrying about her food intake or missing any of her other "exercises" and throwing her into an overstimulated state. But normalcy has never been in cards since day one. I just wish there were more hours in the day. That's all.