What is this (you might ask)?
Why it's a special needs bottle. You know the kind for kids with cleft palates, or other feeding issues (AKA the only bottle my daughter will drink from). You may recall my story regarding breast feeding issues and our experience with the Children's Hospital NICU. This is where The Chub Muffin was first introduced to the Haberman bottle. She was having some issues with eating at the time. I wasn't successful getting her to breastfeed and a regular bottle nipple had a flow that was just a little too fast for her. This was all fine and good at the time, knowing that there were special circumstances and she would eventually have the "suck, swallow, breath" coordination down.
After a few weeks, she had it down pat. No need for that weird looking bottle anymore... right? WRONG! The Chubs refuses to eat from any other nipple now. She's gotten so used to the shape and flow that she's a nipple snob. And the best part (other than the fact that we get strange looks everywhere we go), is that this "special" bottle costs a whopping $30. To purchase ONLY the nipple without the extra parts is a whopping $17! So until we can convince her that long nipples aren't the shiz, and that "big girls" use normal looking nipples (that still never look anything like the real thing, but you know), we're stuck with the weird glances and shocking statements like "WOAH, look at that nipple!"
I just used the word "nipple" 8 times. Time to wash my mouth out with soap.